A Heavy-Hearted Farewell to Rush Limbaugh!

You know, Rush, it's been so nice having you here, and it's sad that now you must go. Seriously, we're all crying about this. But my guess is that wherever you go, it'll probably be a place with loose immigration (as it would have to be), and free health care. Don't do that to yourself. There is a place that I know where you would fit right in. It's a place where the palm trees grow and the sands are plentiful. It's a place where people like you are in the majority. Where pornography is illegal and homosexuals are killed in the streets. A place where the roads run red with the blood of those who don't follow the teachings of a preordained religion. A place where reproductive rights are inconsequential, simply because they don't exist. It's a place where people are NOT free to speak their minds unless fully approved by the government. It's a place where you'll never see offensive material on the television or hear it on the radio. It's a place where the evolution will NEVER be taught in public schools, and neither will the dirty liberal agenda. That place is called The Middle East. You will love it there, Rush. It's a whole country of people just like yourself, and I'm sure the governments there would more than appreciate your radical right-wing thinking and probably elect you dictator in less than a week. Enjoy, Rush. And with a heavy heart, I bid a long, long, long overdue adieu to you and yours. Goodbye, Fuckface!